Sugar-Free Pink Applesauce, or, I Have No Impulse Control and It’s Fun!
Autumn is my favorite season, misfits…HANDS DOWN. What does that mean, anyway, “hands down”? Wouldn’t “hands up” imply more excitement, a la your Bad Mama Genny raises her hands in the air and waves...
View ArticleSlow-Cooker Granola A Jillion Different Ways, or, I Didn’t Intend for this...
Confession time for Bad Mama Genny: I’ve been using my Crockpot a lot lately. Also, my text software just tried to edit “Crockpot” to read “crack pot”. Please let it be known that I have not been...
View ArticleFriday Food Porn: An Apple a Day Is One Less Apple Turned into Alcohol And...
Poor girl is more apple than tree! Don’t ask how I know she’s a girl, I just know (okay, so I spied her fishnets.) We’re buried here, and if you’ve got a bushel of your own to dispatch, you could make...
View ArticleFriday Food Porn: Homemade Hard Sparkling Apple Cider, or, You Impressive...
You’ve been waiting for it. You’ve been begging for it. You’ve been having visions about it. Okay, so maybe you haven’t been having visions (Or have you? If you have, I insist that you tell me, I’ll...
View ArticleBeet, Arugula, and Goat Cheese Salad, or, Next Year’s Trick-or-Treat Option...
You can detox your body from the holiday with light and healthy main dishes like this salad. But what I’ve learned is, you can never truly detox yourself from family (awww…heartwarming. Hallmark,...
View ArticleThe Boy’s Green Smoothie, or, How I Got Trashed for the Gyno and Almost Date...
A green smoothie?!?! AS IF I need a detox! What are you implying, The Boy?! It’s not as if I’m the kind of person who gets trashed to, oh I don’t know, go to the gynecologist!! Oh, wait. Yes, I...
View ArticleApplesauce Dressing, or, Apparently my Status as a T-rex Concerns No One
Me: “I’m a T-rex today!” <waves stub arms wildly> “RAARRRR!!” The Brother: “…” Me: “I’M A T-REX!! RARRRR!!!” <stub arms become more animated> The Brother: “That’s nice.” Me: “Aren’t you...
View ArticleHalf-Wheat Irish Apple Snack Cake, or, We Will Sign Other People’s Books and...
When @dhybiak and Muppet Dan and I work together at the library, sometimes we end up closing the place down. Then the librarian lady has to come interrupt our genius to tell us to get out. Lady:...
View ArticleApplesauce Cake with Cinnamon Glaze, or, I’ve Got the Inadvisable Market...
Somewhere between when the cucumber glut starts and when we start to plan our annual apple picking expedition (aka Applepocalypse), I’m all, holy god, I need to use up the applesauce before it’s time...
View Article
